Why Women Must Keep The Standards High When Looking For A Husband

Porn is so prevalent, according to Regnerus, that if all Christian women left their boyfriends or turned down suitors based on their browser histories, marriage and the future of the church would be doomed. From his article, it’s easy for readers to conclude: Marriage is so important that we may need to start rethinking the idea of pornography as a deal-breaker.

As an unmarried woman, I fall into the target audience for such an argument. Honestly, there’s a lot about being 39 and single that I don’t like. But as one of my friends said when discussing Regnerus’s piece, he’s asking us to capitulate to a worldview that says pornography gets to make the rules, and we just have to live with it. And there’s even less to like about that.


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Singleness Is Not A Disease To Be Cured

It seems to me that the evangelical church places marriage on something of a pedestal, describing it in elevated terms, and investing enormous amounts of time and resources into strengthening that institution. But there was an unintended side effect to this, that as the emphasis shifted towards the significance of marriage, the significance of singleness was minimized.

Of all institutions, church should have been the one place where single people could thrive and feel valued for who they were. After all, there is a deep respect for singleness both in the Bible and throughout church history, just as much as for marriage.


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